The Secret of Comedy 4:20am

The secret of comedy's not what you think.

It turns out there actually are two types of people: listeners and broadcasters. Neither type is more polite than the other, although it is polite to listen. But listeners aren't being patient – they just prefer to listen.

So here's the secret: Listeners are more likely to find other listeners funny, and broadcasters self-indulgent. Broadcasters are more likely to find other broadcasters funny, and listeners self-indulgent.

In other words, someone's always going to find you self-indulgent.

Earthshock

'"I adored the ending of that," says Davies. "I loved killing him, and I don't mean that cynically - it was shattering... He's just trapped. History takes its course... In soap operas, the episode I always love  best is the episode after the death - someone comes into a room and there's a hush and they'll reminisce over a pint of bitter - the after events of a death are more dramatic than the death. I was so looking forward to the first episode of Time-Flight...

"... What do you imagine the episode's going to be like? The Doctor's going to be guilty, maybe the companions want to go home, will they build a shrine to him on some distant rock, where will the journey take them? Two flipping lines of dialogue and they go to Heathrow... it was the first time I sat up and thought, 'This is wrong'...

 

"... When I start to describe the Doctor, Nyssa and Tegan going to some rocky patch, building a cairn of rocks to remember Adric by, that's already twice as dramatic as anything we got. And cheap! Not unfilmable! It's utterly bizarre that they couldn't see the drama in that."

 Russell T. Davies talking in 2013, from JN-T by Richard Marson. I've just read it. That passage stood out.

"I was always heading here." 

 Russell T. Davies speaking to the Radio Times in 2015 about Cucumber, which I could talk about all week.

"Who's that Doctor over there?" Thanks, JN-T, for alerting me to this atrocity.

ROBIN THICKE, PHARRELL SUCCESSFULY SUED FOR PLAGIARISM BY OPENING CREDITS OF "SE7EN"

And watching these opening credits again, you have to admit the similarities to Blurred Lines are undeniable...

I am so sorry.

Let's all go to Japan Expo70!

 The Future, you say? Why that happened in Osaka, 45 years ago...

So many questions.

(Curiosity piqued by this tumblr post)

Sun Dance

Super Kool Kane Mix

Here's the sun. It's nice to feel lucky, and this film makes me feel very lucky indeed. Imagine not seeing this. Imagine if I lived in, say, the nineteenth century. I'm no expert, but those bursts of flame must be bigger than the Earth. Imagine that. I'd have missed seeing flames bigger than the Earth. I know that contemplating the Vastness of Space is supposed to be depressing because it makes you feel small and unimportant, but I actually find feeling small and unimportant a tremendous relief. And I'm sure I'm not alone - you know, religion etc. So thanks, NASA. If I've one quibble with their original montage (posted below) it's with the slightly numbing "bigness" of the accompanying music, so three minutes in  I switched it off and looked for something else to accompany these mighty spumes. "Street Spirit" by Radiohead was simply the first thing I tried - it was the same length and Radiohead just goes with things - but I love what resulted, which is what I've posted up top. That's the sun, that is. Look at it getting down! (I'm off to use my newfound editing skills to stick the opening theme of Knightmare over Koyaanisqatsi touch up my showreel.)

Bom Bom Bom

EXCITING SPACE ADVENTURE 13

Illustration by Michael Whelan

 

"Now, honey -" Zip Startrousers began.

"Zip? What are you -"

"Honey, don't charge. It's not what it looks like!" The Bachelormaker was already in his hand -

"Wait, you said you were over... Zip? They're dressed as... her! THEY'RE ALL DRESSED AS HER!"

LETTER TO MY 40-YEAR-OLD-SELF

Dear me, here are some things I wish I knew when I was the age I am now. Hope they help: 

Christmas Trees aren't just for Christmas...
Nor are Christmas decorations. I know you were planning on leaving them up until February 2nd because of something you saw on QI, but why take them down even now? If anything, it's actually more Wintery now than at Christmas. That tree will die. Keep it all up for ever.

Don't let what you like now make you forget what you liked ten years ago...
There's this great new channel called "London Live" which recreates, pretty much around the clock, exactly what it was like watching television after midnight back when you first stopped living with your parents. They've got "Black Books", and "Smack the Pony", and a documentary about a chip shop. It's brilliant.

One day you'll find yourself asking to speak to the manager of your local Sainsbury's...
And you'll be right to want to speak to him. They've stopped doing milk bags. The bottled milk costs nine pence more. You bought a jug from Sainsbury's specifically for the milk bags. Putting milk bags into the jug is fun, and it's good for the environment. They can't just stop selling milk bags because nobody's buying them. They should have marketed them better. It's crazy nobody's buying milk bags. 

Contactless Payment...
I know! It's absolutely crazy: Lose your card and literally anyone can use it to get anything. And they say "Don't keep it in your wallet," but what do they think wallets are for? Why even make them card-shaped if you're not supposed to keep them together, why not just have a cluster of little payment dolls you hang round your neck? And the local Sainsbury's doesn't even use it! They should actually, it would be a lot quicker.

Jill...
That sound engineer's name is Jill. You've known her for ten years now. Jill.

Netflix is like HMV...
Remember how you never used to be able to pass an HMV without popping in and wandering the DVD aisles for anything up to an hour, staring at the same titles over and over again within your own very narrow range of interests, never choosing anything, or even really meaning to choose anything, just checking for incremental changes in the selection? You can still do that now. At home! At 4am!

It's getting cold...
You probably shouldn't stay up just because you're curious to see how cold the flat can get. You should probably go to bed at the same time as your girlfriend. The one with the job. Go to bed.

Try wearing a hoodie...
You've gone forty years without every trying on a hoodie. Go on. You might as well try your girlfriend's on. There. See how much younger you look? Green suits you. Why don't you have any green clothes? You're a redhead. Put the coat on over it. There! Now you're a superhero in hiding!

Stop talking to yourself...
Or don't.
Remember it's your life to life any way you want, within rapidly shrinking financial constraints. Be well x