So
hopefully Sunday night has seen off that recurring dream where I'm
about to go onstage as Henry VI but haven't learnt my lines. It's a
dream my Dad used to have as well. (Perhaps he still does.) It's not
always Henry VI but it is always a play written in verse: I'm staring
down at my second-hand copy in the wings when it hits and the lines are
always ten syllables long. Now normally the dream ends with me having to
go onstage and fake a few cues, then own up and apologize, clamber down
into the auditorium and head out the fire exit... not defeated, just
disappointed... but on Sunday night it was different.
On Sunday night
I finally decided to take the play onstage with me and pretend I was
reading the bible. (Henry VI is very into the bible. And I also started
reading it a few nights ago... Never realized before how many men in
Genesis wait 500 years before settling down to have kids... Also
interesting to see God was good enough to run up a couple of tunics for
Adam and Eve to wear in exile. Bless him... Very artistic temperament:
"OH IT'S ALL RUBBISH IT'S ALL GONE WRONG... etc.") Of course the
theatrical lighting meant it was very difficult to make out the words
and I kept tilting my head and losing my place - In fact the whole thing
was a joke. But when I walked offstage it was back into the wings, not
the fire exit. And the show would carry on. (It was always going to be
rubbish anyway.)
And this may or may not have had something to
do with the fact that Sunday evening had seen me heading out to Mount
Pleasant to miss an Indigo Moss gig at the Apple Tree, which was fine, I
mean it's fine that I missed it. Better than fine in fact because it
meant I could get some walking done: This is the week I have set aside
to write - as I mentioned in the last post - so a lot of that day had
been spent attempting to... well face up to this fact basically. I
didn't, for example, get round to meeting Benet outside the Burmese
Embassy to take some photos (and the protest he was hoping to attend had
turned into a march anyway so no-one else was there either). I just
paced my room listening to Brian Aldiss on Radio 7 and poring over
tray-sized compilations of pulp science fiction illustration, getting
nowhere...
Because
in the end I'm a peripatetic. If I'm going to write, I have to get out
and walk. And in looking for the Apple Tree I walked a lot. So that was
good. And by the time I found the non-Indigo-Moss, Franco-Irish skiffle
group launching into "Ooh La La" within before a happy press of
excellent old hippies (you know, "Ooh La La": The Faces, Rod Stewart,
I-wish-that-I-knew-what-I-know-now, a sentiment as sacred as
Christmas... anyway apparently it's called "Ooh La La") the sad knot of
transcribed, amnesiac squabbling that had so far been all I could muster
in the name of comedy had blossomed in my head into something a good
deal more interesting - something stealthy even - something with mood
swings and, at the very least, a middle and an end, if not a beginning.
And the beginning's just the bit you end up putting first, I'm sure. Dumas
pere said to Dumas fils: All the talent's in the table, if you put some
paper down on it and rub long enough, something's bound to come off.
And for me it's the streets... Yeah! The streets!Word. So,
yes, how many interviews does it take to turn a writer into a wanker
then. We have our answer. And I should be writing now. And not this
rubbish. Here's some more salvaged Heracles instead: "The Twelf Labour -
Cerbeus of the Underworld." It's very sad at the end. Brace yourselves.
- Your final task will be to bring back Cerbeus, the 3 headed dog from the underworld where you may not come back.
- (At last you can see his face)
- You're a bit heavy for a dead man and if you're not dead I can't take you.
- If you don't take me across you'll be the dead one!
- (Bully!!!)
- Why! I remember you when I with Jason to find the golden fleece.
- I'm hungry & blood's the only thing us ghosts eat.
- I'll kill one of those cattle.
- Hey you want a fight?
- Stop this arguing/ I'm Hades. I know why you've come here and you can have Cerbeus if you tame him
(I can't even make him sit!)
- GRRRRRRRRR
- GAWK
- I've done it.
- Then keep it.
- I suggest you turn your back now Hercules.
Back at Thebes:
- I've completed my tasks but where's Megera
- Didn't you see her in the Underworld. I'm afraid she died with a fever sent by Hera
Very Expressive Well Done!
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